Bittersweet

I was talking to one of my son’s friends momma… you know the one that you have talked to since our kids started school.  And, we got to talking about everything our kids have been through since the 2nd grade.   She asked me if I was ready for graduation?  To be honest Hell no I’m not ready,  I feel like part me is going to lose one of the best things I have every had,  I don’t know how I’m going to be able to send him off to college 4 hours away,  How I’m not going to hear him come in every evening and say Hola Famila you know he almost fail Spanish Thankfully our local weatherman’s daughter helped him through that class, Along with Algebra II I don’t know how he is getting through Trig this year but so far so good…  All the dances he has gone to, all the cross country races/ track meets, motorcross races, horse shows, soccer games… How much he has changed in the last 4 years just amazes me.  How he has been the best big brother a little girl could ask for, not always easy on her but always loved her and looked out for her.  I know I have to let him go and grow up but I don’t want to.   Yep I’m going to be the momma ugly crying at his graduation, going be the momma ugly crying when we are moving him into his dorm.  But at the same time going to be so grateful that we got him through high school, and into college so that he can live his life.  I have seen so many of his friends get involved with the wrong people, places and things.. I am grateful  maybe I have been hard on him but it was for a purpose… and his senior trip… Please Lord let him and I make it through that… 8 boys in Florida I don’t even want to know.

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What Scares Me

Okay,  I’m pretty fearless let me re-phrase that I like to think that I’m fearless you know I’m gonna face my fears… you have nothing to fear but fear itself… yada, yada, yada.  However, there is one thing I can not, will not, no matter how hard I try… they just paralyze me not really I will run like the fires of hell are chasing my ass… I will leave children to fend for themselves at least until I can regroup, strategize,  maim,  just about everything short of killing them to help said children escape.  I would rather deal with the 5 1/2 foot rat snake at my barn that my husband refuses to take care of because they are a  “Good Snake”.   Yeah right,  that snake and I have an agreement I don’t see him,he doesn’t see me.  I rather deal with mice  &  lizards from the barn than these things.   You see these little suckers come in a variety of sizes, breeds, species whatever you want to call them.

So Imagine my surprise when I step out on my back porch this morning and yeah its really early because of the spring forward time thing.. I go to grab the new rake I got for the barn… although I think I broke it…  when I go to grab it this is what I touched,   A tree frog, I’m sure I was my neighbors morning entertainment, yes I leaped off a 4ft high porch right over the railing… I’m just thankful that little sucker didn’t stick to me… I had to regroup… who needs coffee.  Sorry the picture isn’t the best but I could only face this fear at a distance… Where did this fear of frogs come from lets just say a night of bull frog gigging in a cow pasture with my cousins instilled this fear… and I hung out with the mean ass bull of my pop-pop’s .  DSC00574